Can I Afford to Give?: Questions Answered

There was a great question asked in the comments regarding the “Can I Afford to Give” posting on Monday, and I thought it would be a great one to respond to in a new post. The question was:

“What if you currently live paycheck to paycheck? How do you give anything with rent, utilities, groceries, and gas to get to work? Also, what if you have an unbelieving spouse who does not understand the commandment from God? Do you tithe and give, or keep the peace at home? I am sure I’m not the only one thinking this, but maybe only brave enough to ask.”

There are two parts to this question so let’s look at each one individually. First, when you find yourself living paycheck to paycheck you need to find out exactly why. Easiest way to do this is to make a written budget. Dave Ramsey, a Christian financial expert, has written and spoke to millions of people regarding this type of budgeting system and it works. Basically, before each month starts make a financial task list. Start with what income you will be receiving at the top. Next, start listing all the regular expenses that you pay each month in the following order (we’ll use an imaginary $3,500 income with miscellaneous expenses to help show how this works):

Income = $3,500

Tithe (10%) = $350
Savings (10%) = $350
Taxes (15%) = $525
Food (12%) = $420
Utilities (8%) = $280
Mortgage/Rent (30%) = $1,050
Transportation (7%) = $245
Miscellaneous (8%) = $280

Total/Balance = $0.00

I know what most people are thinking after seeing the numbers above, the categories aren’t realistic. Well, they are and they aren’t. $3,500 per month equals $42,000 per year, which is a little under the national average income according the US Dept. of Labor for 2006. But the income aside, most people are spending more on the housing, transportation and miscellaneous categories than they can really afford. What isn’t factored in above is debt. A $350 monthly car payment and $2,100 mortgage payment blow this budget by $1,400 in a hurry. All of the miscellaneous category is probably going towards credit card and other consumer account payments, leaving little or nothing for medical insurance (if not covered through employer) and fun money. It can be very sobering. This is why we do a written budget before the month begins, so that the money is spent in order of the priorities listed above.

The tithe is the Lord’s if you woke up this morning with air in your lungs. The savings is your future, and it’s coming regardless of if we are ready for it or not. Taxes aren’t negotiable. Food, utilities, mortgage/rent, and transportation are all necessities to survive, but the amount we spend in each of those categories can be controlled (Daniel’s steak is great tasting, but I can survive on chicken and rice when needed!). When we find that finances are really tight for an extended period of time, normally a fair amount of the pressure is produced by debt. The car payment(s), credit cards, student loans, equity loans, and all other miscellaneous consumer debt keep our money flying out the door. Fortunately most of this debt can be taken care of over a short amount of time (12-24 months) if we are willing to get serious about changing our consumer lifestyle and focusing on getting our finances in a position for long-term success, a savings and winning lifestyle! Don’t feel bad if you are in this position. Be thankful that you have recognized your financial situation before it gets any worse. Decide today to make a change. As the lifestyle changes and debt is alleviated you’ll begin to get ahead of the paycheck to paycheck situation. There are several ways to speed this up and I’ll address how to get out of debt in greater detail in this coming Thursday’s article.

The second part of the question is a tough situation and it has to be dealt with from more of a relational standpoint. When a marriage is made up of a believing spouse and an unbelieving spouse there is a spiritual disconnect that is occurring. One spouse will be growing and maturing in the faith, while the other is living life as usual. 1 Corinthians 7:12-14 discusses this situation and how it affects the family. The Bible also speaks throughout about maintaining peace and love in relationships and within the home. Perhaps the best scriptures though for this situation is looking at Ephesians 5:20-33. In this chapter Paul is discussing the spiritual authority chain that Christ established for us to follow. It talks about wives submitting to the authority He has placed on husbands, and for husbands to love their wives as Christ loves the church. There are two key elements to take from the authority chain the Lord has established here. As a married woman, God places the final responsibility for all decisions as they relate to the marriage on the husband. Remember in Genesis when Adam tried to swift the blame onto his wife Eve for eating the forbidden fruit? God slapped him silly by basically saying it is your wife, you should know what’s going on and if you don’t speak up. God held him as the husband as equally responsible. That’s not to say woman are off the hook, as each person’s actions or inaction’s will be judged before God, but it does show that because God has given men the position of “head of the home” that they will be judged about how well they managed the home.

So here’s how you have to approach the situation of giving tithes in your relationship. Sit down and discuss your personal convictions about the tithe with your spouse. Don’t preach at them or say that they are going to hell if they don’t go along with you. Simply share your beliefs with them in a loving and informative way as to why it is an important element of your faith to give a tithe. One method may be that if you both bring income into the home that you set aside the tithe on the portion that you are contributing as a start. If your husband is unwilling to accept anything like this then it leaves you only one course of action. Turn it over to God. When husband, or wife for matter, is not open to hearing or following the Lord then you must as a believing spouse intercede on their behalf. You can pray for an opening of their heart and responsiveness to the Spirits prompting of them. It may take days or several years before the change occurs, but the important part is keeping your faith active and maturing and let God work on your spouse. More spouses get pushed away emotionally and spiritually when the believing spouse holds the Bible in their face constantly and preaches a “holier than thou” or “turn or burn” message. A lifestyle of grace, mercy, forgiveness and unending prayer can break doors that no other words could penetrate. Unless the unbelieving spouse is asking you to do something immoral or forcing you to deny your faith in Christ, interceding for a transformation is all that can be done. As the final authority as the head of the home, the Lord will hold Him responsible if he does not permit the tithe to be given.

Hopefully this helps clarify what can be done in your situation, but please let me know if you would like more help or information on this topic.

Can I Afford to Give?

“Can I afford to give?” People ask or hear this question frequently. It’s a simple and yet challenging question. My response to this question may surprise a few of you fellow bloggers and so I thought a healthy discussion is worth a few moments in this week’s Financial Behavior posting.

To answer this question accurately the word “give” must be broken down. Giving, or to give, is simply an act of taking something of yours and offering it to someone else without expecting anything in return (Gabe’s definition…not Webster’s). Giving is an unselfish act that anybody can perform and it can be done in a variety of ways. I can give my time, energy, finances, expertise, labor, emotions, and possessions to name a few. And while I want to clearly address the financial aspect of giving I don’t want to minimize the other areas that giving can take place while being very impacting. Let’s look though at the area of giving financially. There are two types of financial giving discussed in the Bible: tithes and offerings.

Tithe:

Despite what you may believe or how you may interpret the scripture, the tithe is not optional. It is a requirement for all Christ followers. Period! The practice was first discussed in Genesis 14:20 with Abram (later named Abraham), and becomes a constant theme through the Old and New Testaments. The scriptures I want to draw your attention to are Malachi 3:8-12 and Matthew 23:23. I know we are getting a little theological here, but trust me, it is completely applicable to the current issues facing our nation and each of you personally. What is basically stated in Malachi 3:8-12 is that the nation of Israel is under a curse because they have not been faithful in giving the tithe to the “storehouse” (modern translation the local church). The Lord called it “robbing God” and it was true. It wasn’t that God instigated a new practice that the people knew nothing about, it was an issue that they knew the command but chose not to follow it. The same is true today. It’s not that people haven’t heard of tithing before. The Bible is available to everybody and it is each person’s responsibility to pick it up, read it, and apply it to their life. Ignorance is no excuse. Another way of looking at the issue of tithing is to take Jesus’ words in Matthew 23:23:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you pay tithe of mint and anise and cumin, and have neglected the weightier matters of the law: justice and mercy and faith. These you ought to have done, without leaving the others undone.”

What’s Jesus saying here? Basically the religious people of the day were paying the tithe but leaving out the characteristics that a life with Christ is supposed to show: justice, mercy and faith. The opposite of this statement is just as profound and existent in our world today. Many people have taken up characteristics of a relationship with Christ, but refuse to consistently follow His commands when it comes to financial matters. Do you see the correlation here. Jesus wants all aspects of a relationship acted upon. All of this to say that tithing is not optional, questionable, or debatable. It is required and we must do it regardless of how we feel. And for all of you technical people who need Malachi’s “all the tithes” spelled out, it means all. Right off the top. 10% of your total income. Yes, that means your gross Income, NOT the net or after expenses and taxes are paid. Simple!

Offerings:

Most people have no problem understanding this one so I’ll make it brief. An offering is anything given above and beyond the tithe. And for those who may be a bit slower of a learner, this means that you don’t give an offering in place of your tithe or before your tithe has been given in full. With the offering it becomes more of a heart issue. The where and how much may change frequently. When a special need arises in a mission project, you give an offering. When a building campaign is under way, you give an offering. There are numerous types and ways of giving offerings.

So Can You Afford to Give:

So that’s tithes and offerings. Now to the question as to IF you can afford it. We’ve already nailed down the tithe issue. Like taxes, it doesn’t matter if you think you can afford it or not, its God’s so make it happen. You might have to change your finances completely around. So what, make it work or you’ll stay under the curse discussed in Malachi 3:8-12. And when you are faithful to your tithe the promises and blessings are amazing, just read the rest of the Malachi 3!

Offerings are a different story. I’m speaking to two groups of people now. Those with consumer debt and those without consumer debt. If you do not have debt you are in a great position when it comes to giving offerings. You are freed up to financially bless your church and the people you are around everyday. When special needs arise, you are there to help meet the need. What an awesome opportunity you have to be an answer to prayer! However, if you do have consumer debt you are not currently in a place to give offerings. Offerings are not the place for your money at this point. You may give your time, energy and other forms of offerings, but your money is committed to the people and vendors from whom you have borrowed first.

I understand those last few statements may have raised a few eyebrows and that’s fine. They were meant to. I’ve heard it preached hundreds of ways. “Give to get out of your debt”. “Plant a seed for the need.” I’ve even seen one ministry ask people to put a “faith gift” on your credit card! Crazy. Absolutely crazy. I back up my stance with one resource: the Bible. No where in the Bible is debt spoken of in a positive term. It is almost always associated with a curse, slavery, or bondage. God never associates Himself with these characteristics when it comes to living a life devoted to Him. It always just the opposite. Proverbs alone rattles off dozens of verses that link debt to characteristics opposite that of which a Christ follower is to imitate. Proverbs 22:26-27 says, “Do not be one of those who shakes hands in pledge, one of those who is surety (guarantees) for debts; if you have nothing with which to pay, why should he take away your bed from under you” (NKJ).

God doesn’t want us in the bondage of debt. 2 Kings 4 gives a great account a woman who is faced with the loss of a husband and a lot of debt to clear up. When she follows the instructions of the prophet a miracle takes place and provision comes, but he instructs her to first “go, sell the oil and PAY YOUR DEBT; and you and your sons live on the rest.” He doesn’t tell her to swipe her credit card and then pray that God saves her. It’s debt first, then live the life on the left over.

Let’s say you are facing a $10,000.00 credit card bill that has been the accumulation of numerous purchases over the past year, most of which you probably can’t remember. At church there is a special offering being taken that will help support a mission project somewhere across the globe. You really want to support the work but you’ve got this bill that you haven’t paid. If, as Proverbs states, you have committed to US Bank Visa $10,000 then you are responsible first to US Bank Visa, not the mission project (remember, we’re not talking tithe here, just offerings). You’ve already decided before you showed up at church that the place you want your money to go is into all those purchases on your credit card. So take care of them first! If you don’t have the money to honor your first commitment (the credit card), how excited do really think God is if you make another one with Him? We can’t hide our financial issues from Him. He’s God and He can see it all. Our financial integrity and honoring of commits is just as important as a heart to give offerings to Him. And any “offering” being given at the expense of not fulfilling our previous commitment, our honor, is not really an offering at all.

I’ll conclude with this scenario that works every time. If everybody that has debt made a concerted effort to rid themselves of all debts and didn’t do anything until every debtor (lender) was paid in full, think of the savings in fees and interest and other finance charges alone that could be given in offerings. And if you really changed your lifestyle enough and stopped the habits that got you into debt in the first place, think of all the money each month you could put to work in offerings and other areas of generosity! It would be far more beneficial and much more honorable to God to live a lifestyle of good financial stewardship AND giving.